Financial distress and anxiety during the holidays

9th Dec 2024

No matter what we feel is important at this time of year, it’s hard to escape the feeling that the holidays often means spending more money than we usually would. Whether it's gifts, travel or social events, it can be tough to get through December if your finances are tight, particularly for those of us with children with their own expectations.

3 women of mixed ages are sat talking cheerfully at a table.

For some of us, the challenge of balancing your finances with the holidays can be stressful or cause anxiety. This can worsen the stresses that some of us feel every day about our bills. And it can feel like everywhere we look, there’s a reminder or an expectation to spend.

But it doesn’t have to feel this way – you can still enjoy the holidays without dwelling on these sorts of feelings.

Creating a holiday budget can be really reassuring

Budgeting is helpful all year round and can give us a real sense of control over our finances. It’s almost always the first step financial experts recommend if we’re stressed over our finances.

Budgeting is especially useful at Christmas, when there might be extra costs we don’t know whether we can afford. Having a realistic idea about upcoming income and outgoings over the festive season can also help to get a perspective on our finances, and help us plan what we can afford to spend.

Try writing everything down to get a true picture of where you are with things. It’ll be better than trying to remember everything, and it’s helpful to see it all organised on paper. There’s some great advice from organisations like Citizens Advice about how to fill out a budget. Essentially it comes down to totting up your income, then subtracting all essential costs for the month, such as bills, debts to pay and groceries, and finally looking at what’s left over to spend on other things, such as presents.

You could also try using a budgeting app to help get a better idea of your finances. There are lots of these available for free from your app provider. Just search for 'budgeting apps'.

Give gifts of time and experiences

We often think of gifts as expensive things we buy from shops to give to one another. But that’s not the only way we can make our loved ones feel appreciated this Christmas.

If your budget doesn’t allow for big spending, why not consider gifting someone your time or an experience you could share? For example, you might promise to walk their dog once a month, give them a ‘voucher’ for a couple of hours of babysitting, or take on the morning cup of tea making duties for your partner.

Two adults and one child walking together in a woods

Or if there’s something you know they love doing, why not try to organise something? You might give your teen a movie night at home with them, watching their favourite film together with some snacks, or arrange to have your friend around for a board game evening you host. If you’ve got a special skill – maybe you play guitar, or you know your way around a yoga mat – you can gift someone your time to help them learn.

You could even spread the love – how about promising to try to tick off as many of our 50 random acts of kindness as you can alongside a loved one?

Spending time with loved ones is an important part of the festive season, and it can be beneficial for our mental health too. So, you might even find these sorts of presents help you both feel better than traditional gifts.

Still cook special meals, but on a budget

Food for special occasions can be expensive, particularly if you’re hosting for everyone. It can be a real cause of anxiety and stress just pulling everything together – but when we’re anxious about money, that worry is doubled. That doesn’t mean you have to miss out on a special time sat around a table with everyone.

A family sit together having a meal at home.

Firstly, just because it’s the holidays doesn’t mean you have to shop in more expensive places than you’d usually do. If you use a cheaper supermarket, they might have some great deals on holiday food. Shop around – you might find that different supermarkets have deals on different things. It can also be cheaper to buy your Christmas food early, if you have the freezer space to keep it to the day.

There are also some great guides online to cooking for Christmas on a budget, like this one from BBC Good Food. Sometimes all it takes is a bit of creativity – and who knows, you might find a new favourite dish!

If you’re hosting for people, ask everyone to bring a dish along. This can reduce the financial burden (as well as the stresses of cooking) you might be taking on. If you want to make it part of the celebrations, you could help your friends and family prepare their dishes in the run up to your dinner.

Finally, if things are really difficult for you, and you’re struggling to afford even the essentials, the Trussell Trust are here to help. They can help you find your local foodbank or provide advice via their helpline. At this time of year, you might even find your local foodbank has some Christmas items they can help you with.

Have conversations

It’s important to remember when you’re experiencing financial anxiety that you’re not alone in this. The past few years have been tough for lots of us, and money worries have become more common. But this also means that people are becoming more understanding of when things are a struggle for us financially – which is why it’s so important that, when we feel able to, we’re open and honest about the financial situations we’re in.

For example, if you and a friend usually exchange gifts, but you don’t think you can afford it this year and are worried what they’ll think, talk to them about it. A friend wouldn’t want you to be spending money you can’t afford, and they definitely won’t want you to be worrying about them. And who knows – maybe your friend is struggling too, and taking the pressure off them as well is the best gift you can give.

It can be particularly difficult to have these conversations with children. They might not understand the financial situation your household is in, or you might be worried about them becoming anxious about the family finances. There are some helpful guides out there from organisations like StepChange about how to have these conversations.

And if your situation is taking its toll on your mental health, remember that support is out there. Talk to someone you trust, whether that’s a friend, relative, or someone supporting you with your mental health. Your GP can provide you with more support and the Samaritans are open 24/7 365 days a year.